The Derp Chronicals
by BlackMidnightTears
Summary: It's technically Homestuck, but two other (not-so) mysterious trolls are introduced to the mix. Together all of them have to share a house and part of their lives. With the new trolls in the mix, quadrants will be changed, minds will be blown, and the derp meter will be at an all time high. Created by: /25952185
1. Scayla

Sign: Infinity sign

Strife Specibi: Weaponkind (all weapons)

Relations: None

Relationships (in the Quadrants):

Matesprit ( ): No one

Morail ( ): Avline (it's complicated)

Kismesis ( ): No one

Auspice ( ): No one

Fetch Modus (If they have one): Vocal, you simply state what you want.

Planet: Land of Seclusion and Fate

Likes: Anything and everything depending on her mood

Hates: Anything and everything depending on her mood

Personality: It all depends on her surroundings and events, very multi-personalitied

Ancestor: None

Luscus/Kernelsprite: Black and White wolf with wings

Blood Color: Black when alive and white when dead

Appearance: (From Avline's P.O.V) Scayla had long, black hair which she constantly refused to let me dye. She wore it down to her midback and kept her bangs swept over to the side and away from her face. I always assumed she liked it like that so she could see everyone, plus any and all surprise attacks. She was a bad ass like that. Candy corn horns jutted from the sea of black. Curved to a point, they were a nice medium length. Slightly shorter than Gamzee's but taller than Sollux's. She wore a black tee shirt, like everyone else, an infinity symbol was somewhat lost on the material. Though I could always trace it with out even trying, the black on black combo was difficult for everyone else to see. I tried to coax her to a different style so she could show off her blood color. Needless she didn't really budge on the subject. Scayla was taller than me by one and a half inches, a point she always made clear.


	2. Avline

Name: Avline (keeps last name secret to imitate Scayla)

Title: Assassin of Nothing

Age: 6 sweeps old

Trolltag: rainbowJester

Sign: (see pic)(will put up pic later)

Strife Specibi: Mace or a sling shot gauntlet (more often used but keeps mace as an heirloom)

Relations: None

Relationships (in the Quadrants):

Matesprit ( ): Eridan

Morail ( ): Gamzee, Kanaya, Scayla

Kismesis ( ): Feferi

Auspice ( ): Nepeta and Equius (Nep is the mediator)

Fetch Modus (If they have one): Winter Modus (freeze captchalogued items)

Planet: Land of Dye and Communication

Likes: Dying her hair\horns, fashion, human culture, candy, talking, Eridan, sea dwellers, creating virtual games, coming up with different ways for the world to end with Eridan (though not often) sappy redcoms, Marvel movies, slamming Faygos (stays away from Gamzee's sopor pie though) hanging with Scayla, finding out secrets.

Hates: Equius, Fefari, being one upped(though hides it fairly well), broken nails, whiners, math, vegetarians, doritos, spicy food.

Personality: Derpy, actually really smart, very secretive, tries her best to keep a lid on temper (TRIES), loud, spazztastic, actually a pretty decent informant for Scayla, has one liners that are Terezi worthy.

Ancestor: The Rioter (hardest party-er EVER, speaker of the vast Derp, main information pipeline for The Suffer about any high blood activity sort of like a spy, died while on a job\in action)

Luscus/Kernelsprite: Otter

Blood Color: Brown

Appearance: I have been bleaching my hair white ever since I was three sweeps old-I know, young age. At my lusus' request, I leave my tips their natural ash black color. I paint my horns black, to compensate for my lack of color in my hair. They are almost as tall as my moirail's, Gamzee. At their base they splinter off some, but not a whole lot. My fashion style changes frequently, but my current one is a black camisole with my sign printed small in the corner. I'd describe it as a wavy A on the side, with a circle decorating the top point. I usually wear black jeans, adding more and more of a purple tint in them for my matesprite's blood color, Eridan Ampora. I always wear my worn old fuchsia-magenta sneaker as an ironic mockery of my kismesis blood caste.


	3. The End

**John's P.O.V**

I reached out to the door that we had been working for, for so long. It's been a little over 3 years since SBURB started and now here we are at the end. This was the session no one died and we all won. I feel like I should give a speech or something, but everyone's too anxious. I turn the crystal-like knob and all of a sudden a pure white light engulfs us. We are all blinded. I take a step towards the light, soon the others follow me. We step onto pavement, and as soon as our eyes adjust, we sit there with our jaws hanging wide open. Because there in all it's magnificence and glory, is a mansion.  
The mansion is 3 stories tall, and a 1/2 mile wide. I can only imagine how far back it went. The environment, and practically everything reminds me of Earth.  
"Greetings and salutations friends," A voice said in the direction of the house. There in front of the mansion stood 2 troll girl who had just greeted us was wearing a goofy smile on her face. Strangely enough her lower-back length hair was white, and her horns branched off into two at about the center. On of the branched was really short and thin, the other was long and thick, and oddly enough they were black. She wore a black tank-top with her symbol in brown on the corner. She has on simple jeans that were slightly long on her and frayed at the bottom. The other girl had black hair that went down to her calf's. She wore a normal black t-shirt with a faint trace of her symbol on it in black. On top of that she wore a dark gray, unzipped jacket. She also had on black skinny jeans and black high-top converse. The black haired girl, who looked extremely pissed, punched the other girl in the stomach **_hard. _**  
"THE FUCK DID I JUST SAY, AVLINE?!" The black haired girl screamed. Then she resumed her previous stance, as if nothing had happened. The girl named "Avline" doubled over before collapsing to the ground, unconscious, or so I thought."Sorry let me formally introduce ourselves. I'm Scayla (Sky-la)," she said gesturing to herself, "And that's Avline (Av-leen)." Avline groaned in response. "Avline, stop making dieing whale noises. Anyways," Scayla continues, "Welcome to Homestuck manor, this is technically the end of SBURB. We will all be living in this fabulous mansion made by me." She said as Avline staggers to her feet.  
"Isn't it pretty big?" Avline asked.  
"Fine," Scayla sighed, waving her hand towards the mansion. The mansion shrunk a bit right in front of our very eyes. It was still 3 stories tall, just 1/4 mile wide now. "There, now as I was saying," she said as Avline calmly walked over to where we are to lean against a pole. She started to stare at Dave with a poker face. Dave just started back. "You guys will be staying here for, well, I guess forever, or until we all kill each other. Shortly Avline will show you guys around, and I'll help you make your room. But for now are there any questions?" She asked looking around.  
"You win!" Avline said collapsing to the ground, defeated. Dave just smirked in victory, as Scayla glared at them.  
"Any _other_ questions?" she asked looking around.  
"YEA," Karkat said, "WHO ARE YOU?" Scayla sighed.  
"I already told you, but if you mean blood color, ect. then I'm a black blood. Highest blood color, even before Fuchsia, and Avline's brown. Which is..." She started, but then Avline jumped up, ran over, and clamped her hand over Scayla's mouth in a flash.  
"You can ask us the rest later," She said.  
"How do you know us?" Rose asked.  
"Actually, we've been watching you ever since the day you started SBURB began." Scayla said, as she pulled away from Avline's grip, using a forceful grip that made a loud crunching noise.. "And we also know a bit more, ah, personal things from some of your thoughts."  
"You can read our minds?" Vriska gaped.  
"Not really, only once in a while when the program responded correctly." She said.  
"Do we have to go to school?" I asked. Scayla smirked. I took that as a really bad sign.  
"Yes, we will all be starting high school once summer ends." She said. "Which is in 2 weeks exactly." A chorus of groans came from the group.  
"Thank2 for a2king a22hole," Sollux said.  
"If that is all then Avline will show you guys around the house." Scayla said.


	4. A New Home

**3rd Person P.O.V**

The kids and trolls followed Avline through the front door. If anything, the interior was definitely WAY more amazing than the outside. The front door itself was made out of a dark wood, with a stain glass design in the middle. The door knob was made out of diamond, or so Avline told them. The entry way had a beige rug under practically white wood floors where they all took off their shoes. To the side was a door, which contained a large walk-in closet. There was a step up, into the rest of the house. After they walked a short hallway, they entered a large open room. To the right was a large kitchen, with black, sleek, modern, kitchen ware and cupboards. To the left was a large flat screen T.V with a couple of couches and recliners surrounding it.  
"Yeah, we kind of did a little renovation before you guys came," Avline said, letting them take it in. In between the kitchen and living room, so to say, was a sliding glass door to the backyard. Unfortunately the silky cream drapes kept them from seeing outside. Avline kept on derping around and talking while taking them around the house. In the main room there were other rooms for various things including guest rooms, sports rooms, a DJing room (mostly for Dave), and a shit ton of other stuff. Basically everything you could ever want. Then they took a massive, grand, black wire, spinning staircase to upstairs. There, Scayla was waiting. She took them one by one, to their rooms, strategically placing them so everyone was near their matesprite, or moirail, or someone they get along with, while their kismesis was placed far away. Everyone even had their own bathroom. Scayla let them design their room, while she conjured it up. Some people/trolls made it like their previous room, while others made it different.  
"There we're finally done!" Scayla sighed obviously exhausted. "If you need me I'll be in my room. Knock first!" She said sternly before walking off in one direction.  
"That reminds me," Rose said, "Where are you and Scayla's room?"  
"Yes, and what, may I ask, do they look like?" Kanaya asked, intrigued by the new trolls fashion sense.  
"Well, my room is just among yours, it's right over there. " Avline said pointing to a nearby door, while looking at Eridan specifically, trying to wiggle her eyebrows as best she could. "If you guys want to come in for a look, I don't care." Everyone eventually filtered in to Avline's room. She basically had a wide array of shit laying around her room.  
"And Scayla's?" Kanaya asked.  
"Whelp, her room's at the very right of the building, she has a motion detector and a whole bunch of other shit you couldn't even imagine." Avline grinned, "She likes her privacy."  
"So you've never been in it?" Karkat asked,  
"I have, but I've never been able to break in though. Her room is by far the best thing ever." Avline said. "But ya know what? It's getting late and I have a hot date waiting for me,"  
"WWhat?" Eridan asked surprised when she grabbed his arm and pulled him away from the group. "No! Let me go!" He yelled. No one really payed attention because they all went to do more searching around the house, or went to their rooms.  
"Don't worry," Avline purred, "I won't hurt you~"


End file.
